For a long time, I thought people were laughing at me when I said I was a filmmaker. Or I was laughing at myself. I didn’t really fully wear it in the way that I really believed it. I had to make a couple of films to really feel like I was legitimate.
So I put all of this on and I go out on set. I am who I feel I should be. I’m only able to be that because I took off something three years ago that was inhibiting me from being that, and that was my desperation. I wore my desperation like a coat. It was definitely the first thing you saw when you met me. Because it was draped over everything I said, everything I felt, everything I thought, everything I did. It’s the first thing I see in a lot of people, in a tweet, in an email, in a Q&A. I see just this heavy coat of sinking, desperate to get whatever it is you’re trying to make made. You’re in info-gathering mode. You come to these gatherings and think, “Am I interested in this? Can I do this? What is this about? What is this whole independent film thing? How do I get it done?” That’s the cool part. When it tips over into the part where you say “I want to do this,” you get into a dangerous area because you can miscalculate what you’re giving out. And that becomes the death nail in how people are responding to you.
During that time when I was acting in a desperate manner, I needed help to proceed. I needed a break. I needed to nail the pitch. I needed someone to say yes. I needed a mentor. I needed a greenlight. I needed access. I needed a secret password. I needed a rich uncle. I needed everything I didn’t have to tell my story. I could be saying words like “I’ve written a script” or “I’ve been to this lab,” but it was coming out in this way that was not from a place of empowerment.
During that time, I was feeling like this is so big — what I want to do — and the odds are against you. The odds were doubly against me, being black and being a woman. Not having access, not having a rich uncle. These are the things I thought I needed, wanted, or thought I deserved at that time.
I rarely meet people who tell me what they’re doing. I often meet people who ask, “Can you help me?” or “How do I do this?” or “Do you want to have coffee?” “Can I take you to coffee?” “Can we grab a coffee?” “I’d love to take you to coffee and pick your brain a little bit.” “Can I send you a script?” “Can you read my script?” “I have a script that I’d love for you to just check out if you can.” “Can you be my mentor?” “I need a mentor.” “I would love if you could mentor me.” “Is it possible for us to talk?” All of that energy, all of that focus to extract from other people is distracting you from what you’re doing. All of that is desperation.
When I figured that out, things started to change for me. When I’m meeting people and they’re in that moment, I want to say something to them. “Knock it off, because it’s never going to work for you.” That feeling of “I need help. I need all of these things to proceed.” And when I got that, a revolution happened for me.
All of the time you’re spending trying to get someone to mentor you, trying to have a coffee, all of the things we try to do to move ahead in the industry is time that you’re not spending time working on your screenplay, strengthening your character arcs, setting up a table reading to hear the words, thinking about your rehearsal techniques, thinking about symbolism in your production design, your color pallet. All the time you’re focusing on trying to grab, you’re being desperate and you’re not doing. You have to be doing something. Because all of the so-called action that you’re doing is hinging on someone doing something for you.
2) Shortly afterward, Microsoft had to reverse two controversial features: one that required the console to be constantly connected to the Internet in order to play games, and another that placed DRM restrictions on game-sharing.
3) Then gamers realized they needed to buy an already widely criticized $60 annual subscription to Xbox Live in order to get the most out of the new console.
4) Finally, on top of everything else, Microsoft announced that making older editions of the console compatible with the Xbox One would be “problematic,” despite hinting earlier on that they’d be willing to use streaming services to make older games available.
5) The sexism allegations returned in full force as Microsoft published a really weird form letter called “We got your back,” addressed to dudes whose girlfriends won’t let them play video games. It was as if the company didn’t realize that nearly 40 percent of Xbox users are women.
True-blue-brit, a “conservative, culturist, advocate of fair play and rights for women without the use of feminism (because women already have rights),” shared some of his worldview with Tumblr on Thursday:
I’d very much like to punch a feminist.
I’d never, ever hurt a lady but I’d be happy to punch a feminist.
In the wake of the murder, nearly 1,500 people have rallied around an Indiana widow and her son, raising nearly $60,000 in three days to help the family through the holidays.
Now, two brothers, 19-year-old Tryon Kincade and 18-year-old Tyshaune Kincade, have been charged with Vester’s murder. And a YouCaring.com fundraiser to support Vester’s wife, Jamie, and their son, 1-year-old Gavin, has gone viral, with more than 6,000 shares on Facebook and more than $58,000 raised since Thursday night.
It’s a day that will live in infamy, and also tomato sauce.
Despite immediate, massive backlash, the tweet has not been deleted. So far no one has come forth to inform us that the parties responsible have just been sacked.
We live in a world where a corporation once iconically used as a symbol of nihilistic consumerism by a pop artist thinks slapping a flag into the hand of a garish cartoon pasta noodle to mark one of the most disastrous days in U.S. history is “branding.”
As you can imagine, the Internet first held its breath for a collective moment of DOT DOT DOT.
Hello, did you ever find the fics with Castiel spending time in a female vessel? Or you know, alternatively, what nice Destiel fics have you read lately? (I need to... not think about the canon for a minute) Thank you :)
I did find some! None of them were quite what I was looking for but it’s good to know that they’re out there! :D
I had a few posts get reblogged a bit, so there are new people following me! Hi, guys! <3
Just so you know who you’re following, I’m Aja, longtime member of fandom, sometimes known as bookshop. I’m in the Inception / Arthur/Eames fandom and i love it so much. :) I write about fandom and other stuff at DailyDot.com, which is a web-based newspaper that focuses on Internet culture! It’s a nifty job. in October I got to go to Tumblr headquarters and talk about fandom, so that was cool!
I’ve been a freelance editor and writer for a long time, and i’m currently working on a real novel oh my gosh.
I like to sing things and read fanfic and talk about how amazing fandom is, and I really love reading british literature. (Also Nero Wolfe! <3). I live in Brooklyn with a very nice housemate and her two cats. :)
The company’s marketing campaign comes after a year of whimsical moments from corporations interacting with the public, some less real than others. We’re hopeful this will lead to a long line of DiGiorno holiday livetweets. How the Grinch Stole Deep Dish? Mary Toppings? The Night Before Thin Crust?
Or maybe they can just stick with musicals. We hear Sondheim has a documentary coming up. Scintillating 20th-century malaise mixed with internal rhymes and a pizza company trying to style itself as a pop culture junkie? What could possibly go wrong?
On second thought, forget we asked. Just send in the pepperoni rounds.